SPIN DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE!

Our  house the Dr. Stole

 By Howl Pillai

We got it  all wrong again !  Now even a houseman can tell that millions in this country are sick and tired, as the Doctor should have been  in the Hospital and the Rakyat in the House.

 After all it is our House,  and to think our only living ex -PM stole our Dewan Rakyat from us! 

In response you say, “What about Abdulla Badawi ?” 

No! No! No!,  he is not really an ex –PM, he is more correctly our axed Prime Minister, axed by the ex -PM. 

Come to think about it, the ex -DPM of black eye fame was also axed by this ex –PM,  and so too Musa and Ghafar, ex -DPMs,  were also axed by this ex -PM. 

Notice how  the current PM is trying his best to axe for good the ex – DPM, most Malaysians believe  the ex -PM is also behind this. 

Malaysian politics as you can see, is full of axes and exs. 

Occasionally a keris shows up out of the blue, this happens when someone or other announces he wants to be PM and in the fullness of time, an ex -PM himself,  well that is another story altogether.

So do ex-ercise ex-treme  caution when reading the Doctor’s memoirs, be also on the look out for events that have been conveniently axed or "can't remember", plenty, including the “Poison” label.

Next note that survey after survey shows that Malaysians are notoriously poor readers, at the rate of 50 pages per year, most Malaysians will take all of 17 years to complete this 843 page book, and since it is the older folk who have reportedly bought the book, many will die while reading it.

Poor souls! If you have aged parents or elderly neighbours  do them a favour, tell them to stop reading it. 

And we all know life here is full of ironies, here is the doctor who pushed through the change in the medium of instruction in our schools and universities from English to Bahasa Melayu against all good advice and  today millions of Malaysians cannot string together a proper sentence in English let alone read a passage in his memoirs with full comprehension, that means they are “misunderstanding” all the time. 

One of these days an MP will say that to reduce the ironies of our life, we must cut back on foods containing iron. Did you not notice our ministers often say ‘they have been misunderstood’ whenever they run into trouble ? 

Now you know why! The Doctor will no doubt claim the same  when his memoirs are attacked for political lying. How convenient!

And yet more ironies abound. The translation rights of the book into Bosnian, Albanian, Chinese (via the Peoples Republic Of China) and Bahasa Melayu are being negotiated. 

We gave the Bosnians a big hand in their hour of need, so Bosnian is understandable.

Albania is best remembered for its late Communist dictator, Enver Hoxha who ran his country to ground,so Albanian is also understandable. 

Chinese is also perfectly understandable, both the PRC and Malaysia have a similar agenda - keeping the Chinese population under tight control.

BUT, yes, but, translation into Bahasa Melayu ? It beats me and it should beat you ! Why did this advocate of all things Malay not write his memoirs in Bahasa Melayu ? Not your mother tongue? Proud of being Malay? Come, Come.....Why not call it “Doktor Dalam Rumah”?. Then we can ask : Rumah Siapa ? I am waiting with glee for the BM version!

And then there is this matter of what he would have done if he had declared himself PM -for -Life in 2004. A half dozen nightmares come to mind............

1) In a move to try and win the pissing war with LKY, the crooked bridge would have been built. Promptly he will call it the world’s longest crooked bridge and leave you wondering how a crooked bridge is actually measured. Crookedly?

2) The Third Link to Penang, a bridge to Pangkor,  and three  even longer bridges to Tioman Langkawi and Sumatara would have been built or plans laid out for them. The cronied- classes will find all this a mouth watering prospect. Some will choke on their own saliva and die. Their companies will be compensated handsomely for ‘loss of potential income’ ala our expressways contracts.

3) He would have raised enough funds with strings attached all the way to the purses of his kuncus and kakis to undertake the mother-of-all mega projects, cutting the Isthmus of Kra. He will insist the peninsular be henceforth be called Pulau Melayu disproving the adage that no man is an island! At his suggestion the new seaway’s official name -The Malaysia Boleh Canal.

4) He would have switched us back to English. Now millions of school children will compulsorily read his memoirs which by now has replaced “Interlok” as our officially doctored national text! What else ! Millions will also score a doctored “A” in this subject - a requirement for entry into our local universities. Meanwhile this flip-flopping between BM and English will help us understand with unsurpassed clarity the double talk of our politicians. Sampler : “I say man. Why you no undi me? You already take my money which I also first first take from you. If you ta’ vote me bruder, you mampus you know! “.

5) He would have pushed us hard (pun not intended) to achieve a population of 70 millions. This so that we can buy or use national cars, national buses, national motorcycles, national bicycles, national yachts, national trains, national ships, national planes, national laptops and a host of other ‘national gadgets and appliances’. Perhaps even national hand phones.  By now all Matsushita plants have been relocated to Vietnam and elsewhere. We will be staying in shoddy crony built national homes (notice we are getting there now....). Meanwhile the national car power window problem persists and manhole covers still cannot sit flush and level  with the road nationwide!

6) On account of such policies there is widespread opposition to his rule. From time to time he hands over power temporarily to the IGP. The IGP in turn launches in succession “Ops Rumput”, “Ops Belukar”, “Ops Semak” and “Ops Hutan”. The deforestration of the land is nearly complete. Even the tough lallang grass is hard to find. Green NGOs across the globe raise a stink. The Doctor goes on national TV and says he will safeguard the independence of the country at all costs. Meanwhile a few thousand citizens languish in Kamunting  under ISA. It includes a few bloggers, standup comedians, satirists and cartoonists. All ‘anti- national elements funded by foreign parties jealous of our success’. Huh!

On account of these events and changes, the Doctor would declare that “Vision 2020” be pushed back to 2040. Henceforth the national vision will be officially called :”ADJUSTED VISION 2040”!

We must all be thankful that he spent the last 8 years in semi-retirement writing up his version of his history ! Enough is enough!

TO PALANIVEL: A NOTE ON THE INDIAN QUESTION

 
Throughout history there have been rump states.

A quick tour of modern rump states - Serbia after the breakup of Yugoslavia; Russia after the demise of the USSR and Pakistan after the creation of Bangladesh. 

Older historical examples are Poland and Cambodia, Poland , painfully sandwiched between a powerful Czarist Russia and an aggressively militaristic Prussia was repeatedly partitioned ( the Austro-Hungarian Empire was also complicit ) until it ceased to exist as a State by 1795. 

Closer home, the Khmer Empire, ascendant in Southeast Asia for half a millennium from about 800 CE was gobbled up from the east by an expansionist Vietnam and from the west from by a fast rising Siam, the Cambodia you see today in maps is a rump- a mere shadow of its once territorial and cultural might. 

All that is history. 

The question to ask now is whether you can have a rump people within a modern state ?

The Jews of Europe post  WW II come to mind, fifteen million or more were  wiped out in the period 1933 -1945, millions more fled or were dislocated, the  Nazi ‘Final Solution’ was preceded by the European ‘Jewish Question’. 

Now in Europe Jews are found in thriving or not so thriving pockets - 300 000 in UK and 500 000 in France are notable, surviving or existing or prospering they are never liked or loved except perhaps as individuals.

Greeks and Armenians living in Turkey today are also rump people.

In 1453, the Caliph having conquered Constantinople  invited the Armenians to stay and help in the development of an expansionist empire, the community brought skills that were unique- in finance, trading and services that helped build a vast empire straddling Asia and Europe, they numbered in the millions then and their churches were numerous. 

Modern Turkey is the successor state of a genocidal Caliphate, the Armenians were all but wiped out between 1890 and 1914, and  today they number some 50 000 with their own schools and newspapers and count for nothing in the national life of Turkey.

In Malaysia  a rump people exist. 

They are called Malaysian Indians. 

How these Malaysian Indians  ended up as ‘rumps’ can be debated endlessly, these people are themselves keenly aware of their ‘rumpness’ though they have not been able to apply a label to their predicament,  I am merely the label supplier. 

What more clear proof of their rumpness than when eminent persons of patently  Indian origin denounce their ethnicity for another, or when community leaders urge poorer sections of them to return to the impoverishing jobs of their grandfathers in the estates.

I will leave it to a Pole and a naturalised British citizen and a giant among twentieth century writers, Joseph Conrad to ‘speak’ on behalf of these people  but, before that, allow me to state that this rump people in Malaysia are sandwiched between two powerful peoples- one a political giant and the other an economic one.

In 1918,  Conrad very eloquently  addressed the pain, agony and deliverance of the once rump state, Poland in the same year by writing “A Note On The Polish Question”,  I am struck by the similarities and lessons it holds for the rump Indian people in Malaysia.

Here are selective excerpts from his note:

“....for at that time Poland was perfectly defenseless from a material point of view, and more than ever, perhaps, inclined to put its faith in humanitarian illusions...”

“ The strength arrayed against her was just overwhelming”

“Thus even a crime may become a moral agent by the lapse of time and the course of history. Progress leaves its dead by the way, for progress is only a great adventure. It is a march into an undiscovered country ; and in such an enterprise the victims do not count”

“....the claim of the spoliators who by a strange effect of an uneasy conscience, while strenously denying the moral guilt of the transaction were always trying to throw a veil of high rectitude over the crime”

“What was most annoying to their righteousness was the fact the nation, stabbed to the heart, refused to grow miserable and cold”

“Since that time we have come to be regarded simply as a nuisance. It’s very disagreeable”

“The spirit of aggressiveness was absolutely foreign to the Polish temperament”

“Given the wrong, and the apparent impossibility of righting it without running into risks of a serious nature, some moral alleviation may be found in the belief that the victim had brought its misfortunes upon its own head by its own sins”

“On simple matters of life and death a people is always better than its leaders because a people cannot argue itself as a whole into a sophisticated state of mind out of deference for a mere doctrine or from an exaggerated sense of its own cleverness”

“There is nothing on earth that turns faster on its pivot than political idealism when touched by the breadth of practical politics”

“It was the idea of delivering the victim with a kindly smile and the confident assurance that “it would be all right” to a perfectly unrepentant assassin”

“....and also the fact that for better or worse it was impossible to get rid of it again except by the unthinkable way of another carving, of another partition, of another crime”

“Therein lies the strength and the future of the thing so strictly forbidden.....of the Polish independence expressed in a Polish State. It comes into the world morally free, not in virtue of its sufferings but in virtue of its miraculous rebirth and of its ancient claims for services rendered to Europe. Not a single one of the combatants of all the fronts of the world had died consciously for Poland’s freedom...”

No Mr. Palanivel! No! A thousand times I say No! 

Neither going back to the estates nor migrating to the towns and cities of this prosperous land is the solution to the Indian Question if either is done without self respect and dignity.

They  must embark on a new journey of self reliance.

They  must once again function as individuals and not as a community holding a collective begging bowl called MIC, for the sake of the community throw away that begging bowl you hold in your hand, for on it is a plea carved in shame, “Please Help Us”. 

No one, no race, no government must redeem the Malaysian Indian, the Indians must be the instruments of their own redemption, then like Conrad, they  too can say with pride, “we have saved ourselves from our ‘rumpness’:”

“And its just as well! Providence in its inscrutable way has been merciful ; for had it been otherwise, the load of gratitude would be too great, the sense of obligation too crushing, the joy of deliverance too fearful for mortals....”

Japanese Tsunami, Malaysian Tragedy and Asian Opportunity

Image by tdietmut via Flickr

I am holidaying in India, my wife just received an sms saying BBC has announced that after the explosion in the second nuclear reactor in Japan there is a danger of some fallout in the Phillipines, I switched on the BBC and hardly saw any mention of any such thing, they were only talking about the immense losses suffered by Japan and the the fact that the Bank of Japan has pumped some few trillions into the economy, to get things started.

There was also the news of the team from China going into Japan to help and that India would be sending blankets to Japan, absolutely no news about any nuclear fallout affecting Phillipines or Malaysia as the sms had suggested.

I move down to the business centre and get on the internet and even as I am writing one person from Malaysia sends me an sms, it says and I'll give it to you word for word, "There was  a nuclear blast 4.30 p.m. Sunday in Fukushima Japan. If it rains today or in the next few days, do not go under the rain. If you get caught out, use a an umbrella or raincoat even if it is only a drizzle. Radioactive particles which may cause burns. alopecia or even cancer, may be in the rain. Reaching Malaysian shores by 5 pm today. Stay in the house."

"Experts say a disaster on the scale of Chernobyl in the 1980s is highly unlikely because the reactors are built to a much higher standard and have much more rigorous safety measures." From the BBC


As far as I can safely say there is no immediate danger even to Japan, the problem is well being taken care of, that was the news I heard this morning before leaving Cochin for Quilon, and now at Quilon at the hotel after surfing the web and all news channels all I can say is some Malaysians need to grow up.


I do not blame those who sent me the sms, I sometimes do the same knowing it could be the wrong message, then I go out and check if it is right, in situations like this its better to be safe the sorry, but to the scum who begin such irresponsible romours they need to be arrested and charged with romour mongering.

The earlier message also asked everyone to stay indoors, this is a great Malaysian tragedy, shouting wolf,  creating romours, what happens when the real thing happens, and the greater part of the tragedy is that this speaks volumes about the credibility the Malaysian Press and Government has with the people.


I go into the Malaysian press pages  to see what's going on and find out that the UMNO owned Berita Harian has come out with a cartoon on the tsuanami, and has issued an apology after being criticized, but what would one expect of an UMNO owned Malay publication anyway? Had it been something about interlok or about the Indians or Chinese in Malaysia you could well forget the apology, it has happened time and time again,  this country in the past, Japan is different but I shall not get into this at this time.

Of course, all Malaysian are deeply moved by this disaster in Japan, I think in the midst of all this China's response is timely, China must put all its differences with Japan aside and take a lead role in assisting Japan at this time - both China and India needs to come out and proactively take a lead role here.

China and India with their advances in nuclear technology should send in their experts to assist Japan here, in doing so Asia will be seen as actively capable of  looking after Asian issues, and that will bring Asians closer together, this is an opportunity for Asian bonding, so that we can be free of interference of other powers that have managed to divide us for so long,  so well.

Japan has always aligned itself with the west, an initiative by both India and China and other Asian countries like  South Korea and Taiwan will be the opportunity this great disaster could present Asia as a whole, and bring Japan back to Asia so that it aligns itself with Asians first then with others.

That the Japanese people will come out of this disaster and regain their place as a world economic power is a forgone conclusion, but  that they should do it with more Asian involvement is a necessity, so Japan can break loose of the noose placed around its neck since the end of world war two and be totally Asian again.

Asia must reclaim Japan, and Japan must come back to Asia.

Related articles

• Japan earthquake causes risk of meltdown at nuclear reactor (sheffnersweb.net)
• So you want Japan to be a true Asian business hub? (search.japantimes.co.jp)

Gaddafi's next move

Saddam promoting women's education and literacy 1970's

Is Gadaffi Being Saddamed?
by Toffeesturn

Is Gaddafi making his move, that is the question on the lips of many especially  the Americans and the British.

Well of course that is what Whitehall wants and so too the White House, and the way they look at that "move"  is for Gaddafi to move out.

Tehran on the other hand and so too  China, Russia and even some of the NATO nations woudl like to see Gadddafi retain his grip in Libya at least for the interim.

The Arabs are a different breed, and again although from the same breed the pedigree changes depending on the part of Arabia they come from, their religious inclination, their political beliefs and the type of Arabs they are it is a mixture of all these that is an Arab and you have as many mixtures as you have Arabs, that's how complex the Arab problem is.

When the mixture differs you know what you are looking at, there are so many and they are all,  almost all, ferocious, and Sadam Hussein recognised that a long long time ago.

Giving democracy to an Arab is akin to giving durians to the English and forcing it down their throats and telling them go ahead eat this, it is after all the "king of fruits, "  for  want of putting it mildly.

All said Arabs are Arabs, and Arabs and democracy only makes the entire Arab world crazy, so in a nutshell they can't have democracy, less we have a crazy republic, and that is something we would not want from the Arabs of all people and  if you know Osama bin Laden, you'll know what I am getting at.

Iraq was a prosperous and progressive nation under Sadam Hussein, people from all over the world worked and did business in Iraq, it was a Middle Eastern Power, and had a stabilising effect on Middle Eastern politics, Iraq prospered because Saddam realised that democracy would never work in a country like Iraq, not with his Arab brethren, not with him, and not especially in a country where religious tensions amongst the two rival Islamic sects ran so high on the one hand and that both these groups could at any time get into loggerheads with the Christians and peoples of other religions, there was a Kurdish problem to manage too, so he ruled it the way an Arab nation had to be ruled, the Baath Socialist way, and I hope at least in hindsight people will admit that  it was indeed  the best way, especially looking at Iraq today.

Both Gaddafi and Saddam promoted equal rights in their respective countries, women were given positions in the administration and the army long before any other Arab nation even thought of doing so. Why even Gaddafi's personal bodyguards are women, and both these leaders  brooked no religious intolerance in their respective countries.

When  Iraq took over Kuwait,  after all an Arab State (which historically was part of the Babylonian Empire, until some white man gave it some boundaries) the entire World took on Iraq and interfered in what was  internal Arab affairs.

Saddam did not have the 'Monroe Doctrine' or its equivalent  with which he could legitimise this takeover and prevent outsiders from interfering in Arab affairs,  if Iraq had gone for Israel it would have been a different proposition, this was an Arab state,  but  when Iraq went to war with Iran earlier, many of those countries that had gone to Iraq over its take over of Kuwait supported Iraq, that's how world leaders play marbles.

The interest is always oil and the means to control this commodity, that is what the powers from  Whitehall the White House are keen on  nothing else, and if that means killing Arabs so be it, after all they are only Arabs.

An embarrassed English government has also admitted to having interfered with the internal affairs of Libya, and even the Libyan rebels knew what was good for them and turned down the offer, they have learned their lesson from Iraq.

All of Arabia is aware of what happened in Iraq and they do not want it in their land, they too yearn for happiness like everyone else, but this prolonged ill treatment and deprivation of the Arab by the West using some Arabs has resulted in a sense of hopelessness  which makes many of these people turn to the likes of Bin Laden and his band of merry men for hope and salvation.

Gaddafi keeps telling the world that the day he leaves Libya or is moved out, the Taliban will be on the door steps of Europe and he is not wrong, because Libya will again be reduced to another Iraq with tribal wars and tribes being forced to take sides in the conflict.

Libya will then be ripe for Taliban picking, and lo and behold on the shores of the Mediterranean, you'll find parked an organisation (THE AL QAEDA)  whose time would have come, is that what Europe wants?

Well if that is what Europe wants that is what Europe will get, be forewarned, the signs were there before the Gulf war of what would happen in Iraq, the world was lied to, and see what is happening in Iraq today, it will happen in Europe, and the springboard will be Libya.

In the Libyan scenario the better option is for all parties to get together and negotiate a settlement with Gaddafi still in for the interim, this should be under the auspices of the United Nations and not the Americans, or the Russians, nor the Chinese or the British, the UN will not be out of choice there is India and France to oversee such a truce, failing which the world may force  Gaddfai to play his last card, and that is an all out purge of those who oppose him, should that fail he will make his next move whatever and wherever  that may be and pave the way of a glorious Al Qaeda  entry. An Entry into Europe.

Move aside Charles Martel, Bin Laden has come and the new battle of Tours is about to be begin.1279 years after yours.

History does repeat itself, but we never learn.

Related articles

• Why the US must not intervene in Libya | Stephen Kinzer (guardian.co.uk)
• Analysis: West wins some backing for Libya zone, needs more (reuters.com)
• Libya is a conundrum made in hell - or rather Downing Street | Simon Tisdall (guardian.co.uk)
• Murders Continue in Libya As the Arab World Looks on Silently (desertpeace.wordpress.com)

The Road to Egypt

Will Egypt happen here?

An ex-PM and the PM have answered with an emphatic No!  And  I cannot agree more.

Of course it will not happen here. Our power elites have not quite ruined the country like the Egyptian ruling classes have. 

Why have their power elites scored higher than ours on “national ruination”? There are a dozen reasons for it.

First, the Egyptians have had more time, on a historical timeline they are really oldies as old as the pyramids. 

We are just young chicos if not chicolingams (these latter ones are very  small Lingams  that make judges look like even smaller pricks) when it comes to history. Mere new kids on a new block. 

All the same we will get there there one day. Any evidence for it?

Look at some of our ancient politicians....they have been around for some time now and saying and doing the same old things. At least one of them sounds like the mummy of a once powerful Pharaoh come to life again! And also, we are still merrily re-writing and revising even our recent history. At last count Yap Ah Loy, Hang Tuah and Parameswara have been reduced to historical footnotes. Really, can you make Tutankhamen a mere footnote of history and get away with it?

Second,  a very long time ago they  mastered the art of picking the pockets of the poor masses and kept at it without let up. How else can you explain the Great Pyramid of Cheops, or the Temples of Abu Simbel,  Hatshepshut  and Luxor  while we are stuck with only the Twin Towers? 

Well we are learning. Notice that  thousands of students  were flown back from Egypt at the height of the crisis. What were they studying there? Mummification ? Agriculture ? Sand Castle Engineering? Pyramid Scheming? Your guess is as good as mine!

Third, they have traditions and cultural practices much older than ours like ‘baksheesh’. Literally it means a present or gift  and just like us, if not more , they are proud of their “kebudayaan”. 

Someone defined baksheesh as : “remuneration and lavish bribes, rudely demanded but ever so graciously accepted in return for little or no services rendered .” And as far as I know there isn’t  an Egyptian Anti-Baksheesh Commission, but then again perhaps all matters baksheesh come under the purview of  the Egyptian Ministry of Culture and Performing Arts which is something we should also consider. As I said, I think they are way ahead of us on the learning curve.

Fourth, they have simply gone ahead and stolen more, without restraint, without fear. 

Now you know why some countries are addicted to ‘Emergency Rule’. Egypt was for a long time to single party politics. 

If we want to become as corrupt as Egypt we must first destroy the Opposition and  declare a state of emergency,  here, it now looks like  a work-in-progress.  One day we may get there. Then the real stealing can begin. 

You will be surprised how many in Egypt joined in on the gang bang of the nation’s coffers! That is why I am not keen on the slogan “1MALAYSIA”. It may become just the right excuse for all of us to unite to the last man, woman and child to  plunder and pillage this land of ours.”Satu Malaysia, Satu Kali Hentam”?

Fifth, their corruption operates at a ruthless level, that even James Bond will be traumatised.

There is no quantum of solace when it comes to diddling the State of its dues.  Where do you think Ruby the Heart Stealer got her initial training ? Their corruption is of the ‘starve the masses kind’. No quarters given.  Only your pants will be spared  minus the pockets. And  cronyism and nepotism there are on steroids, all bulked up. 

However  over here the face of corruption is gentler. The “sama-sama” type. We are all in it together! Haven’t you noticed that every year corruption is becoming more inclusive even as we become more racist?

Sixth, their Rate Of Rip-off (ROR) exceeded the rate at which wealth was being created. The trouble with the World Bank and the IMF is that they do not hold any ‘kursus’ on newly coined topics like ROR for corrupt leaders. Any  smarty-pants  corrupt leader worth his subsidised salt should know that ROR must keep pace but never exceed wealth creation. By this reckoning Hosni Mubarak  is daft. We have smart leaders don’t you think!

Seventh, Egypt’s industrial sector is largely state owned. In all likelihood they have many more GLCs than us. Imagine the bailouts. Think of many Sand Darbys running around in Egypt. And if they hide behind a pyramid of losses who will know? Remember there are many pyramids there. And don’t forget pyramids have four sides. So Egypt simply needs Jews, Chinese and other entrepreneurs and risk takers like the desert thirsts for water. 

We made our choices a few hundred years ago. For the Egyptians this is a tough call. The last time they got Moses and his gang over, they left in haste after throwing some pox around and fled to no-man’s land after parting the waters of the Red Sea. If the waters are parted again,  Sharm el- Sheikh will lose its charm and chic and tourists will never return to “-el-”, if you know what I mean!

Eighth, notice that they are masters at religious hypocrisy. How else can you explain them getting away with stealing from their co-religionists? They have the Islamic Brotherhood and we have PAS. The former is banned and many of its membership jailed  whilst PAS sits proudly in our Parliament.  Why do you think we put them there in the tsunami of 2008? Thank God for that! 

Ninth, they don’t have oil to get their hands all greasy.  Not only do we have oil but it is “off budget” as well. As I said we are very clever. Now no one knows how much money we make from oil barring a select few. And these poor Egyptians, they even chose the wrong palms.....they get the date and we get the oil palm. With these two oils around our power elites don’t have to pick the Rakyat’s pockets all the time for now. They just pick Petronas’ pockets!

Tenth, they have a bloated civil service that does nothing. We have a bloated civil service that does something. And that makes all the difference! 

As a reward, ours is over-paid and as punishment  theirs is underpaid. Their civil servants are  out on the streets demonstrating whilst ours is out on ‘kursus’, meetings, seminars, ‘attending to officials’ or having the fourth coffee break of the working day.

Eleventh, they have only the Suez Canal as testament to their involvement in global trade. But we have Singapore linked to us via a causeway that narrowly escaped becoming a crooked bridge. Notice Singapore’s GDP just overtook ours this year. Do Egyptians have neighbours like ours ? Israel, Libya, Sudan..... Clearly we live in a better neighbourhood. And the important lesson to learn from all this is that with regard to neighbours, never let your leaders get away with  building crooked bridges of friendship. It will come back to haunt us all.

Twelfth, their education system produces graduates like the desert needs sand. Many are from non-technical disciplines like religious studies. And by law every Egyptian graduate must be given employment. We ? We don’t need the law to force our hand. Like the Nike advert, our politicians  just do it ! Now we have an  800,000 strong civil service!

There! I told you there are a dozen reasons for it ! The real question to ask is not whether Egypt will happen here but to ask, “Why the fear if they are not coming here ?

I think the fear is, we are going there!

PUTTING UP A FRONT.

Image via Wikipedia

By Howl Pillai
 Introduction
Chief Great-Tinpot  runs a tinpot party which if it were a country will surely be called the "Republic of Banana Rajahs". This is not being outlandish. Consider this : We have a thriving 'pisang rajah' industry. And when you offer bananas as big as rajahs you get monkeys as big as maharajahs. Now Chief Great Tinpot wants to be Chief-for-life and problematically for us, a few afterlifes as well. In the interim, Chief Dear Tinpot,his son, is being groomed for high office. And Chief Great-Tinpot keeps deferring the date for his arduous, once in a lifetime journey to what can only be the Indian equivalent of Mt Kumgang. Once there he plans to sip 72 teh-tariks everyday served in freshly cut crystal goblets.And in between sips he will summon his minions and lesser chiefs at random to pay him homage. Anyone who does not comply is sacked and then told he is too small to talk. "How bizarre,how bizarre", you mumble in disbelief.

PUTTING UP A FRONT

But it is true that political monsters like Chief Great-Tinpot are not born. They are made. Made by the Front. More specifically by the entity behind the Front.

We should have in hindsight stuck with "Perikatan" or "Alliance". Afterall it was "Alliance" that gave us Glorious Merdeka ! An alliance is an agreement among parties in furtherance of a common cause. Now see what happens when you tinker, chop and change with names and ideas as important as this one. Really we must have gone 'bananas' to have agreed to a name change like 'Barisan Nasional' in place of the "Alliance". Sure, "Barisan Nasional" sounds and feels more formidable than its predecessor. But from the beginning it had an inherent problem in translation in more than one sense. Later, self-serving politicians would capitalise on this defect. In its short form, the Coalition became "Barisan". In English that translates as "Front". There, now you have it !

For close on four decades we have all had to put up with a Front. A Front, the likes of which  was never seen before in this fair and lovely land that is trully, Trully Asia ! A national Front that was politically sophisticated and devilishly clever. We were not even aware for a long time that we were indeed putting up a Front. At least prior to March 2008. Then a mirror held to our face reflected a ghastly apparition that clearly was not us anymore.

Now it suddenly dawned upon us all that we were  creatures of a Front organisation set up and controlled by another entity. And for a good part of those four decades Chief Great-Tinpot served as an excellent Front-man.

The Front-masters were happy with him. Even jubilant. At last a Front-man of the right calibre. Nevermind that with every passing year the  Chief's girth approached that of King Henry the Eighth. In him his mentors had a Front-man for the long haul--obedient, ambitious and greedy. And later, with the passing years even the skeletons in his closet would 'put on weight'.

Early in his career he was tacitly made to understand that he could self-deal on the side. The Front would provide cover and stand by its  Front-men. This was a perk and a promise made to all the chiefs, both Indian and non-Indian, both big and small, in the Coalition, but the cover came with a price. They had to deliver the 'goodies'.

Now with Indians, Chief Great-Tinpot knew that delivering the 'goodies' was always dicey and difficult. For every Indian was a potential renegade. Give him a voice and he will shoot his mouth. Give him a pen and he will write. Give him an opinion and he will split it into hairs.Give him a whole party and he will break it up into pieces and factions. And so Big Chief sat on the wall, pondered a while and came up with a simple solution- Exterminate all the other Indian Chiefs ! He wiped out the chiefs of the 'Cheyenne', 'Sioux', 'Pawnee','Mohawks','Mohicans', 'Crow', 'Navajos','Choctaws', 'Blackfeet', 'Bigfeet' and other tribes too many to mention.

Soon after the completion of the merciless campaign of elimination he declared himself the 'Embodiment of all the Indian Tribes'. Then he was able to safely deliver the 'goodies', which are actually little slips of paper which Indians were told to mark "X" against a perfectly balanced ancient weighing scale which looked suspiciously Indian in origin. In return, Chief Great-Tinpot brought from the Front, news of war victories and of a substantial 'war booty' that was soon to be shared with all the Indians. The weary foot soldiers of the Indian Tribes cheered lustily and pledged to support and to sacrifice for the Front in the 'battles' yet to come.

Ah ! This Front was indeed a very clever one ! In a way, and we must be honest about it ,we were happy putting up a front. In other countries this process is called propaganda. In these parts it is called National Unity. But alas ! The 'war booty' was not shared with the Indian tribes as promised. Instead the Front delivered a much reduced portion directly to Chief Great-Tinpot who kept it all for himself as in many a previous occasion. A grizzled old warrior who had fought in many a 'goodies' campaign bristled with anger and expressed his disgust at this latest double cross, spitting out some half-chewed tobacco: "I never thought I would see this day. The Front that we knew in the past is now an affront to us.When I die bury my heart at Wounded Pride by the shade of those old rubber trees!". Another old warrior chimed in :" As for me just bury me down by the river in my ancestral village of Empty Stomach".

Thankfully, no nation and no tribe can put up a front forever. The charade had to end someday. And when Chief Great-Tinpot lost the Battle of Snail River in March 2008, the Front was exposed! And the tribes rose to a man in classic disunity as in the days of yore and bayed for the blood of the Great-Tinpot who is now  chief in all but name.  

Perhaps what did not work for BP in the Gulf of Mexico may work for us here- topkill. After that the Indian must learn to vote with unabashed self-interest. Lets stop putting up a front!

Umi to vie for Wanita UMNO Top spot

Umi Hafilda the "political actress par excellence" who almost single-handedly saved Mahahtir in 1997, by getting Anwar off his back and implicating her own brother in the process, and whose influence in Merlimau needs to be carefully gauged must be surely having her sights  for the Wanita UMNO post as Sharizat and even Rafidah of past would not have been able to match her effectiveness, or so  it seems.
 
The Star in a report carried on 6 March  stated, "Ummi Hafilda Ali still has the ability to make waves wherever she appears. Love her or hate her but you cannot ignore her." she has stories, and a lie told often enough gets to be perceived to be the truth, a Hitler philosophy practiced so well by someone so close to her i do not need to mention him here.

For a woman of such "substance" to UMNO, UMNO can't afford to ignore her capabilities or she may do the next best thing squeal on UMNO at the next General Elections.

Word has it that she has been contacted by a  former UMNO strongman to do just that with a promise of great rewards if she delivers the humiliation to Najib, Mahathir and the rest, and she has the capability of doing so, but the question is will she? Or even, can she?

The UMNO script written for her which she used at Kerdau is;  " I still have several things to disclose, if he still accuses me of taking money, conspiracy and so forth, I'll have no qualms in exposing him."

There must be a scriptwriter or scriptwriters whose job it is now to write Umi's speeches for the General Elections that is why she says, " I still have several things to disclose...."

Being the younger sister of PKR deputy president and Anwar's closest aide, UMNO found her the right target to say things about Anwar to get him convicted by the infamous justice Augustine Paul, and now in the face of the uncertainties that plague the calling for  the next General Elections,  Kerdau and Merlimau, UMNO  were  testing grounds by  trying Umi Hafilda and it seemed to have paid handsome dividends.

It is not Malay to go public and condemn one's own brother, why amongst the Malays this is almost totally unheard of. why did Umi decide to do just that? What was her motivation, or better still what was the power of the force that made her do it, and come back and do it again. Normally at this stage it should have been let bygones be bygones.

Umno must have a very strong hold on this woman, what it is for the moment can only be reduced to roumer but whatever it is she is willing to wreck her brothers entire career send him to the gallows for all  she cares and be faithful to UMNO for some reason other then all those 'noble' reasons she talks about.

Is she doing this out of her own free will, or is it being done because she is being blackmailed? Maybe a lie detector test may shed some light, although  that can't be taken to be conclusive.

Any woman who says such things about her brother will weep for two reasons, one it is the truth, if it is, consider this,  does she so easily take the rostrum and do it?

Or,  could it be that she hates herself for doing so and has no alternative but to do so, because she is being blackmailed?

Mahathir claimed that he believed her when she began to cry, but he did not believe Lee Kuan Yew when he cried on the separation of Singapore, so why believe this lady, because that was the best opportunity he had to give a reason of belief, and we all know Mahathir's excuses of convenience, after all Anwar was not helping him to help his sons out of the huge financial mess of 1997 that they had got into.


Was Umi crying because she was to tell lies about hurt elder brother? anwar was nobdy but her brother was now brought int the fray and she was destroying him, could that be  the reason of her tears?

Although Umi harbours great plans for UMNO positions both at wanita and at the executive council, she actually has no power to move in because the powers that be here are the ones that seem to have the control over her, and Sharizat can rest peacefully for the time being at least, because in politics, and especially UMNO politics, things can change course and an ambitious Muhyuddin,  Khairy Jamaludin  and the Mukhriz Mahathir could play the card to get back into power with a lucrative deal for Umi Hafilda at the end of it all.



Umi on the other hand has to be mindful, this is UMNO and there are lessons, Altantuya Shaaribu for one.

GIVE US A REAL PARLIAMENT AND WE WILL GIVE YOU A NEW COMPLEX

Image via Wikipedia

 
by Howl Pillai


Yes that's what I said ! Give us a real Parliament and we will give you a new complex.

Unlike the detractors, I say: What better place to make a fresh start than Parliament? We can get going again when we have a real Parliament housed in a sparkling new complex!The present one, just 47 years old is a bit of a disgrace. A national embarrassment even! Its roof leaks like an old bucket and its air conditioning is as dodgy as the artful, hot-headed parliamentarians that need cooling . Things got so bad that once it was even shut down for all of two whole years. On another occasion recently, its not so hallowed grounds even doubled up as a temporary abattoir. What a shame !

And for the record,some 80% of all legislation initiated by the Executive was passed into law in this same building without any amendments.So it is entirely untrue that rubber and its allied industries, like rubber-stamping has seen its heyday. And this very building is no colonial vestige. Built in 1962/3 it then cost a modest RM16 Million. That, mind you, was in the innocent and happy pre-massivecorruption era of the sixties. Please note "massivecorruption" is now widely regarded as a single word in this country.They are inseparable. In today's terms, such a building will cost some RM200 Million,assuming an average annual inflation rate of 5%. The new complex we are informed is estimated to cost a whopping RM800 Million. We have 222 raucuous parliamentarians prone to whooping and chanting.Now that works out to  just RM4 Million per lousy, noisy and vulgar mouthpiece of the party or if you prefer political mouth organ.Mercifully, we are a forgiving nation of kindly also-rans, driven by a passion for mediocrity and with a penchant for cost overruns. So we will generously throw in the additional RM600 Million.We simply need a real parliament no matter what the cost.No expense should be spared.Give them the best.Not just a building. Give them a whole complex and be done with it! We must get it right the second time. And I know I speak for most Malaysians when I request the following strings be attached like all things in this fair land :

1)It must be free of even the slightest taint of scandal.The contract for its construction must be awarded on the basis of an open and competitive bidding tender process. This whole process must be made transparent so that even a fool can see through it.The whole tender process must be telecast live. This is more important to us than the live telecasts of the World Cup.After all the World Cup comes around our way once every 4 years whilst Parliament may never come around our way!

2)One of the first things we want within the new complex is a world class 'animal testing' facility.It would be hard for any MP to object.The Lower Chamber has repeatedly echoed with cries of "Binatang", "Babi","Lembu" and "Ular".We suspect too many animals have sneaked into Parliament under disguise and cover of darkness. More scary still, we now have sufficient evidence that these animals have taken over the last vestiges of legislative power remaining in Parliament. All MPs must therefore be stringently tested on a quarterly basis and the results made public.

3)To retain the salient and defining principle of Parliament regulating its own affairs, we insist the new complex contain a modern detention centre to house all ISA detainees who are also MPs.The voices of the Rakyat's representatives must be heard in Parliament even if their bodies are incarcerated.Also one of the first acts of the real Parliament would be to pass an Act setting aside the Kamunting Detention Centre exclusively for the use of ordinary folks like writers,thinkers,poets,musicians, academics and a steadfast and principled judge or two(if there are any still left)

4)The new complex must have a well equipped branch of the National Registration Department given our MPs' propensity for quickie multiple marriages and divorces. Sudden death is also now an issue.Tell me who in this country is not tired of both bye and buy elections? An efficient branch of this Dept will go a long way towards reducing time wasting and improving MP productivity.Later we can  set some very basic KPIs for our MPs like attendance and punctuality.

5)Which brings us to the need to have a 18 hole golf course and club for MPs within the sprawling grounds of the complex.Besides helping us know where to find them in a national emergency, it will cater for their recreatinal and sporting needs.The soon to be approved sports betting business will do just fine to fill the gap although we have our reservations about gambling.Please note the Rakyat has consistently maintained that fighting to legalise things deemed 'haram' is akin to screwing for virginity even if the fight is led by a former PM.

6)We insist that both a primary and secondary school from anywhere in the Klang Valley, like Rawang for example,be transferred in toto to the new complex.MPs should be encouraged and be given incentives to send their children to these schools. This will have the singular benefit of impressing upon our Ministers and MPs the true state of our education system.The MIC must take note that the same rules will apply if they as usual request for a Tamil school within the complex.

7)We insist any one of the large supermarket chains open a store within the complex.Besides catering for the favorite past-time of some of our MPs and Ministers ,shopping can now be done locally in the comfort of the precints of Parliament.Besides it will help them know the true cost of living.They can then decide which subsidies to keep and which to remove after ensuring the selling of sugar,salt,sardines and salted fish is properly licensed. These items now form the staple diet of our working classes.As an added benefit prices of essential goods can be monitored daily by MPs and Ministers without resorting to making sense of complicated statistics,graphs and pye charts.

8)To ensure no citizen is abused unto death nor thrown out of the upper floors of buildings when 'routinely questioned' we insist a National Interrogation Centre  entirely of glass be built within the complex and within sight of Parliament.We need their urgent oversight of the police force.

9)To ensure the project is completed on time,we insist Sime Darby be pre-disqualified. Besides we want to plant the seeds of true democracy not damn it.Their resources will be stretched cleaning up Bakun Dam anyway.

10)To ensure the complex does not turn into a white elephant we insist political leaders,past or present,suffering from megalomania or variants of it be excluded from all committees entrusted with any part of the project.We have all now learnt that ego-tourism has emptied the national coffers. The fear of bankruptcy now looms large in this land.For once in a long time, no one wants to see 2020 !

11)To ensure full accountability, all members of the 1998 Commonwealth Games Organising Committee be excluded on the basis that they have yet to present the Accounts of the Games. We still do not know who got the Wealth but we know the common people picked up the tab.

12)Likewise all those involved in some dubious way or other with the disastrous PKFZ mega-project be excluded.Besides, Parliament is better known for horse trading than for advocating free trade.Witness that even selling sugar now requires a licence.The next item that will be licensed, the rumour mills say, is the humble condom. We are not surprised because only the Government has a monopoly to legitimately screw us.

13) To ensure the Rakyat is never kept in the dark nor be victimised by news blackouts, we insist TNB guarantee that power disruptions are few and far between in the new complex. Simply put, we want Parliament to be properly empowered.Above all it should not be some shady extension of the Executive.

14)Since almost any significant activity is now deemed worthy enough to set up a university for its study, we insist that a university be also set up within the premises of the new complex to cater for 'parliamentary studies'. Why should this initiative surprise anyone at all ? Have we not heard it be said so often by our erstwhile Ministers : "The matter is now before Parliament and they are studying it in detail!" We propose the to- be- set up institution of higher learning be called "University Demokrasi" or "UDemo" for short. And its motto by unanimous agreement: "OUR PARLIAMENT IS EITHER AT OUR FEET OR AT OUR THROATS"

Citizens ! Lets Demo!

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Iran and US vying for greater influence in Messy Middle East

Libya in tatters 

Egypt's revolution seems to have been all noise over nothing, the military is back in power they have even appointed a new prime minister and the next thing they will do is to appoint a new military strongman as president ,that the US had a strong hand in what happened there is no secret.

The Americans may not really  want Gaddafi  out, he is manageable but the Americans are worried  a post Gaddafi Libya will  send oil  spiraling up even higher then present day prices and the new leadership  hostile to American business interests.

The need for intervention and an American presence is thought by the Americans to be the best idea in a post Gaddafi Libya, but as usual the Americans read all situations wrong and this is very very wrong.

Any American presence will only encourage the presence of Hezbollah and Al Qaeda, that will turn Libya into another Iraq and make it ripe for Iranian picking.

The Libyans on both sides of the divide will not want the Americans in, if at all anything they may even join forces to keep "Uncle Sam," out.

The people who could help Libya out of this situation and keep the Americans away is Chavez of Venezuela, he has already offered assistance to bring warring sections together and the Arab League is in agreement with his suggestions, but Libya's new opposition has flatly turned down any suggestion for negotiations with Gaddafi.

Chavez may play yet another card and bring the very respected Fidel Castro into the fray. Castro is well respected by most left leaning middle east nations and the Arabs have a huge respect for both him and Chavez.

If all fails Gaddafi could be headed for Cuba or Caracas, its not that he has no choice, the west are aware of this possibility and that is why they are demanding that all Gadafi's assets overseas be frozen, less he transfers them either to Cuba or Venezuela.

So you see American intelligence "is a contradiction of terms" as there is absolutely no intelligence in what they do, the CIA is more like the Central Idiots Agency.

To intervene in Libya will only provoke the Arabs and give the Iranians and Syrians all the advantage in the propaganda war against the American, it will open the door for Iranian intervention via the Hezbollah and Hammas.

The Muslim brotherhood is not Al Qaeda, far from it, they are but an Islamist organsiation trying to implement Islamic law in the Arab states, the Muslim brotherhood is predominantly Sunni whilst Hammas and Hezbollah are both Shite, both Hezbollah and Hammas operate in Arab territory which is predominantly Sunni,and that could spark inter faith clashes between the Muslims of the separate confessions, and in the process push the brotherhood towards Al Qaeda, a situation no one wants.

Ahamdinijad  of Iran is also using these conflicts  as an effort to divert attention of the opposition in his own country that threatens to run berserk over his rule. Iran is still ripe for another revolution, and it is a clear indication that the great revolution of Iran was not that great after all. It has not delivered on its promises and the Iranian peoples are getting fed up with this regime.

 The entire Middle east is in for regime change, it is the inability of these people to actually focus on the main issues that make their revolutions ineffective, and subject to being hijacked by others as is the case in Egypt. The Arab nations need real and credible leadership, which is lacking terribly in these states.

Ideologies differ, you have the extreme fundamental religious groups who coerce using religion and besides them there is hardly a choice, that is why Gaddafi once said that the people do not know what they want and as a result the government would give to the people what it thought best. Evidently Gaddafi did not give enough and what he gave was too little too late.

Libya may need another Gaddafi, a more benevolent  Gaddafi, Egypt may require a Nasser a benevolent Nasser, who would then prepare these countries for a democratic transformation.

Now as Libya slides into Civil War, what is to happen of Egypt and the Arab and Iranian revolutions.

Apparently no one cares, the whole world is only worried about the oil, who cares for the Arabs, really no one,even Chavez is doing it for the sake of Oil.

Can our Police Chiefs match this Indonesian Cop

In Jayapura Indonesia the police chief Adj. Sr. Comr. Imam Setiawan has resigned of his own accord to take responsibility for what his officers had done.

Adj. Sr. Comr. Imam Setiawan said he made the decision because  the "moral responisbilty" for the incident should be attributed to him, and apologised to the family of the victim, a young lady who was forced to perform oral sex by three of his officers.

This police Chief did not wait for any investigation into the incident to take place first, neither did he make a statement to say that appropriate action would be taken against his officers, but took responsibility for what they had done and resigned as there was nothing much he could do in the circumstances.

“As the chief of the Jayapura police force, I hold full responsibility for the immoral acts of my three subordinates, that’s the consequence of being the leader. I consider myself to have failed in my duty and am hence resigning my post.”

He  apologized to the public for the officers’ actions, "their  duty is to protect and serve but instead they used the advantage of their positon to commit this heinous crime it is a shameless act, and i apologise to both the public and the family of the victim."


The femalevictim now being detained   at Abepura  revealed she was forced to perform oral sex on three officers during a three-month period while in remand at the Jayapura Police’s detention center.

The victim told the press that the incidents occurred between November and January, when she was being held for illegal gambling.

The officers in question were sentenced to 21 days in jail and slapped with administrative sanctions, including a delay of promotion.

Whilst being criticized over the light punishment, he was not in a position to mete out harsher punishment, no one from the family of the woman including her husband has come forward to make a police reprot, and unless someone does he has no powers to chrage and prosecute those involved in this incident to the fullest extent of the law.

"I remain powerless to bring criminal charges against them, but if they do come forward, I will ensure that the officers face the full extent of the law,” he said.

He has taken the blame for what his officers had done, in shame he has acceted responsibility, and has quit his post and the force.

This can be a classic example for our Top Cops to follow, how often and how many more times must me hear of detainees dying whilst under detention and our Top cops making all the excuses for it.

When a person is detained by the police his security becomnes the responsibility of the force and if anything should happen to him the top person in the department has to take responsibility.

We salute Adj. Sr. Comr. Imam Setiawan, you are a man Sir, a gentleman.